So there I was. I received a package in the mail containing this band called SuperUltraSomethin'-Somethin'. Well, the package didn't contain the band itself, but their new CD. Anyhoozy, I was thrilled. The press release was like "SuperDuperWowieZowie are the best new mod band in town!" Mod, I thought! How grotesquely wonderful! I must listen to them, I said.

My story doesn't end there. I played the CD, and a confused expression painted my face. Wait a second, I thought, what's so MOD about Ultra-MegaWhoop-dedoo??

And that's when it hit me... I had no idea what Mod was. I mean, I always suspected, but now I knew. I mean, I knew I didn't know. You know?

In fact, I am ashamed to admit that MegaZippyFlippy just sounded like rock. Hard rock, sorta rockin', with whiny vocals and a devil-may-care attitude. Sure there was Mod imagery in the liner notes: bullseyes (mods like to play darts), vespas (mods like to ride little motorized doodads), and pictures of England (mods like to travel). But in the music... i just don't know.

That is why, my good people, there should be a band that just comes right out and says "Okay, this is mod and this and this and here's why!" Why keep us guessing? Mod to me is a big in-joke that only The Jam and The Who got. I say we demand the truth from MegaUltraScrappyDoo. Isn't it time we deserved it?